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A Time of Day you Should Never Shower
Driven by forces beyond my control I
began today as I so often do. Sleepily striding through my dark
hallways I got in to my shower and was engulfed by the warm water.
Concentration long ago shed like my bed sheets I ran in a catatonic
state, my mind not preoccupied but simply absent. Finally in a moment
of surprising mental ability I broke out of my semisomnous showering
and glanced at my watch. Oddly enough the minute hand was rather
slow... My alarm goes off at six, with the addition of my daily
matins of procrastination I tend to be in the shower at ten after. My
watch read three after.
Still more tiered than I had ever been
in the morning I mulled this interesting fact over as I conditioned
my hair and then, still in deep thought, added shampoo to the frothy
mess on my head. After using the shampoo as a body wash and rinsing
out my hair I looked at my watch to see if it had simply been a
morning mirage. No, it wasn't, my watch clearly read 1:05... odd. I
soaped my razor and shaved as I continued to ponder this development.
After several cuts, and the stinging from the lathered blades brought
me farther in to the wakeful world it clicked. I probably just woke
up before my alarm went off and showered, which meant that my alarm
was pointlessly going off as I stood there. I made the water hotter
as I reflected in the fact I would now have time to read the comics.
Wait... 1:05? I looked at my watch
again, yes, It clearly read 1:10 now... this wasn't right � Did I
change the time on my watch for some reason? No... Was I really then
showering at one ten in the mourning, five hours before I had to
actually wake up?
The air was cold and gave me goose
bumps as I paced back to my room, still damp from my midnight shower.
Unable to dry my hair completely I dressed back in to my pajamas and
slid back in to my bed; the alarm clock quietly blinking it's
agreement of my rather untimely awakening. Enjoying the prospects of
five more hours of sleep, but a little confused, damp, and
embarrassed as to how I ended up in the shower in the first place I
drifted off to sleep. At least I wouldn't have to take a shower when I
awoke.
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